“Dad, you’re crazy.”

As a senior in high school, my daughter has feelings for multiple boys. Today one showed up, and they conversed. I asked her at dinner tonight if she planned to text him to maybe schedule a hangout for tomorrow. She appears to know more about the anti-pitch than a lot of the people I engage with in the WordPress community, based on the look I got.

She is aware that the golden rule is to avoid appearing overly dependent. It’s perhaps more accurate to say “thirsty.”

That’s why the anti-pitch is so powerful.

“You were right.”

I answered a Clarity call a few years back to address a person’s enquiries. Yes, I did. To be honest. However, they didn’t appreciate my response, primarily because it didn’t agree with their opinions.

“You were right, even if I didn’t want you to be right,” they said when they phoned me back a year later. While I was grateful for the criticism, I had trouble recalling a conversation from a year ago.

When they enquired about my coaching, I informed them that my fees were too high for their stage of development.

I did not approach them. I pitched them down. I declined their offer. With grace. I even suggested other people for them to speak with.

Similar to my daughter, their reply was along the lines of “you’re crazy.”

Pitches Don’t Work
Pitches don’t seem to be effective anymore. I believe their downfall began soon after Valentine’s Day in 2005. Yes, that is quite particular. But I don’t suppose we noticed if pitches were failing back then. It would take a few more years for YouTube to reach its current level of popularity.

Though YouTube was established on February 14, 2005, we didn’t hear someone say, “I just looked it up on YouTube” for a little while. However, we now hear it constantly and everywhere.

You may be wondering why I believe pitches are unsuccessful. And the answer is actually quite easy. It all comes down to information availability. Customers were left in the dark by the previous asymmetry, and those who were  doing the pitching with all the knowledge.

The disparity is eliminated by having unrestricted access to knowledge and information. And with it, the pitch loses its significance. The know-it-alls and the know-nothings are not in the room. Everyone is an expert in everything. After a few searches, they can at least assume they do.

Why Does the Anti-Pitch Work?

Now don’t get me wrong, the anti-pitch isn’t the Heisman. I’m not suggesting you simply tell everyone no (that’s another post).

The anti-pitch works for three reasons:

• People value honesty, and you’re being honest. They will reveal their BS detector if you tell them that everything is beautiful, amazing, awesome, and flawless. However, they will respect your candour if you are truthful about how difficult things will be, how costly they are, or any other information they need to know.
  
  
• People are grateful that you are helping them. The reverse psychology will take over and they’ll desire what they believe they can’t have even more than if you were marketing them when you offer other options that might be a better fit. And it’s just polite to be helpful with a list of options if you’re genuinely trying to say “no.”
  
  
  
• You’re emphasising your lack of dependency. People that are successful are able to choose who they do business with. People in need cannot. However, people would rather collaborate with prosperous people than those in need. You are flipping the roles with the anti-pitch. Who is making the pitch to whom? Not the case with you. Rather than the other way around, they are making a case to collaborate with you.

How Does the Anti-Pitch Work?

The world in which we live is overrun with pitches. We are therefore on watch.

Because it moves in the opposite direction, the anti-pitch is energizing. We concentrate on the obstacles, difficulties, and outcomes that lie ahead of us rather than just the good things. This honesty is so unique, the contrast so striking, that it frequently astounds and delights others.


The anti-pitch can sound like the “warning” I was just mentioning, or it can sound like a “no, not right now.” “I don’t think this is a perfect fit,” is what the message is trying to express. If I were you, I would act as follows.

The goal of the anti-pitch is to be helpful, and even memorable, so that the door isn’t firmly closed.

How Does the Anti-Pitch Sound?

Allow me to demonstrate two basic situations and the sound of the anti-pitch.

Alongside a Job Applicant

Our work is really demanding here. It will feel difficult, require a lot of focus, and require learning the subject. It won’t be simple.

You almost seem to be stating that you would prefer not to work here. You don’t say that, though. All you’re doing is pointing out the truthful details that others miss. Thus, when a potential employee weighs their options, you come across as the trustworthy one. Additionally, the challenge motivates someone who desires to push oneself.

With a Potential Customer

We’re not the most affordable option in town, to be honest. I would be pleased to provide you with some options if you would want a less costly choice.

Once more, it seems as though you’re telling them to go somewhere else. However, you’re not. All you’re doing is informing them that this probably won’t work for them if price is their main deciding factor.

People Often Come Back

I mentioned the caller a few years back to you. then gave another call. The fact that I wasn’t in pitch mode astounded them. Perhaps they thought that I would accept any customer, for any sum of money. They had never met me.

However, they phoned me back again a few months later to give me an update on their development. And by then, they were aware of what they wanted and what it would cost and we worked together for a couple of months.

Because I hadn’t shut the door behind them, they returned. I hadn’t pitched them, though, either. I had explained to them why they weren’t a good fit in an honest manner. They went to work, clicked right away, and then left.

With the anti-pitch, I’ve seen that individuals frequently return.